Over the past couple of months, more and more of my local girlfriends (I’ve got them all over, dahhhling) have either stumbled upon or have been invited to visit my blog. To some, there is quite a distinction.
One friend sent me an email after the topic of my blog came up during our Girl’s Night Out:
K,
I’m sorry if I was out of line reading your blog. I’m new to this stuff, and I’m not sure I am up on blog “etiquette”. As I mentioned, Tracey told me about it so I thought I’d take a look. I guess I thought that if it was on the Internet then it was open to all, but like I said, I’m not sure about these things.Regardless, I felt awkward and wasn’t sure what to say. If it helps, I really enjoyed reading it.
I wrote back:
You’re so sweet and you have ABSOLUTELY nothing to apologize for. Your last statement about the internet being open to all is the total and blessed truth. People have blog because they want to be read. If they wanted privacy, they would write in a locked diary. I am one of those odd and needy people. I like the feeling of the online community and have made some very dear friends that I now know in real life through the blogging medium. I enjoy the feedback I get from my visitors and thrive on the more and more I come to have.
I’m not expecting this to make a ton of sense to you - blogging is a confusing subject to many people. The WHY factor is huge. For me, it’s much cheaper than therapy and provides many of the same benefits. It allows me a place to let it all out and have people understand. And I like to make people laugh. That makes me happy.
The shock you saw registering on my face at dinner was not because I was upset at you. I was just shocked that anyone locally was reading my blog. I’m very happy that you like it and hope you keep reading. Actually, I’m the one who should apologize for making you feel uncomfortable. That was not my intention at all.
Hope you have a great day and sorry again about making you feel weird. I’m the weirdo.
Hugs,
The Weirdo
Another one of my good friends, who is actually my realtor as well (YAY contract!), said to me:
“I visited your blog a while ago but I felt like I was snooping because I wasn’t invited.”
How freaking polite.
I was really surprised by the concern these friends expressed about being wary of treading on my personal space. I guess I’m just a nosey fool because the thought would not have even crossed.my.mind. I’d read your blog, your diary, peruse your medicine cabinet and poke around in the contents of your trash can if left unattended. I thought everyone was like that. Go figure.
It’s an odd thing to try and give a good explanation of blogging and why we do it to someone who has never experienced it - the reading or the writing. It is both deeply personal and very public at the same time. Again, to me this make perfect sense. To them- not so much.
How about a run down of the blogoshere in general?
I guess the best way to explain it is to simply say, I’d love you to read, and let them figure out the why’s of blogging by themselves. Heck, it’s gotten enough press lately.
The only reason I haven’t told my friends is that I would feel more self-conscious when I see them, like “Are they going to ask me about that post?”, or “Why didn’t they mention that post.”
So, I feel more comfortable without them knowing, but if they found it by accident I’d feel good about it. I figure if they’re surfing blogs, they probably get the blog thing somehwere inside of them.
I haven’t even told my husband I blog!! So I have no idea what I’d do if I knew someone I knew in “real” life was reading my blog! LOL!!
It’s an odd thing isn’t it? You pour all this stuff out there to total strangers (who become not-strangers).
I think of blogging as a hobby. If you do it, you get it. And once you start reading some… well, you get kinda hooked. And then you might start one of your own. Isn’t that how it usually goes? That’s how it was for me at least.
I have told only a few friends. I do wonder if anyone has stumbled upon it that I don’t know about! I guess that’s part of the mystique of blogging… :wave:
I just think it would be a tough job to try and explain it.
I do it for those same reasons-”it’s much cheaper than therapy and provides many of the same benefits. It allows me a place to let it all out and have people understand. And I like to make people laugh.”
Most people do’t get it, but they’ll put MORE personal and embarassing stuff on a MySpace page. THAT, I don’t get. I HATE MySpace.
Basically, I don’t talk about it to people because no one I know is really aware of blogging. A lot of them have MySpace or some kind of forums or chat, but no interest in blogging.
It’s like, “If I have to explain, you wouldn’t understand!”
Most of my family and friends know now. At first I wanted it to be quiet so that I didn’t feel like I had to hold back if I wanted to blow steam about someone. It’s become a lot more for me.
Now it’s more a way for me to practice my writing and to connect with people. The few who read my blog make me smile just ’cause they were there and they thought I was important that day :-D It’s something that is 100% mine and it makes me happy and brings me joy. That’s why I do it.
Srry I haven’t visited in a while! I’ve been really busy with the new blog :-)
P.s.
I have the exact opposite problem, btw. Everyone knows about my blog…but none of my friends/family really ever visit! LOL.
I have never told a soul. Most thought I was insane when I met my husband on the internet. And so it goes …
I don’t know. I don’t talk a whole lot about my blog in “real” life. My sister reads it, but none of my other family members. My husband doesn’t even read it and his name is in the title! LOL!
YAY! A contract! That is awesome!
Aww…you have some really nice friends. Way politer then me!
I kind of wish I had never told anyone about my blog. A bunch of my family and friends read mine, and then sometimes they want to talk about my posts and I don’t necessarily want to discuss what I let hang out all over the Internet. Go figure.
I invited all my family and friends and I told them it was a site about our new little family. That seemed to make sense to everyone. To me it is a lot more. Actually I got my Mom lurking in the last few weeks b/c she clicks on my blogroll (you are on it btw
)
I’m always amazed at how many people read - I only know when they mention it because they don’t comment. I love it - that’s because I must be self centered!!!
Enjoy your 15 min. of fame! LOL!!
LBC
Hi Petroville Mom!
I really enjoy being an anonymous reader of your blog! :-) I’ve also tagged you for a musical meme. I hope you don’t mind.
http://beneaththemaskmomoftwo.blogspot.com/
On another note, I think that if my family didn’t know I blogged, I’d be more willing to talk about more personal issues,openly. Oh well. :-) Maybe some day I’ll get enough guts.
It’s weird trying to explain this blogging thing to others…. Yes, I want to talk about my personal business on the web, for everyone to read. I love comments, especially from people I don’t know… hmm. I guess I’d have to say, “you just have to try it, and then you’ll see!”
Enjoy the meme!
-SmilingMom
The locked journal thing never worked for me. When I write, I need feedback. I need to know if I’ve hit a nerve, made someone laugh, even pissed somebody off. I write to say “this is what I’m thinking about x” - and I hope that by leaving a comment on my blog or sending me an email or speaking with me in person that others will tell me what they think, too. I like the sharing, the social aspect, the feeling of connectedness. Blog on!
Susan
I don’t try to explain. If they don’t feel the urge to blog, they’re never going to get why we do what we do.
I have a very good friend who has only recently come to know about my blog (only because I had to upload my radio show at her house one night)…and she & her husband now read it.
But really? I can’t even FATHOM the thought of her blogging. I guess she doesn’t NEED to, you know? (I totally don’t get that, but whatever)(heehee)
My family knows I blog, but they don’t know how to find it (thank goodness they’re computer illiterate, even more than me!!) and I do NOT invite them to come and read it. Otherwise I couldn’t bitch about them.
I started with a live journal, and I still use it for things I don’t want the ‘general population’ to read–it’s a friends only and I only have a few people allowed there. That’s the place where I bitch about the rest of you.
LOL! KIDDING!!! It’s my Zoloft place, you know what I mean??
xoxox
I, too, am a secret blogger. (In fact I attempted to take credit for the concept of a society of same, but apparently the society is also so secret that nobody has ever joined me. Irony, your name is over-success.) Anyway, there’s a meme swirling around out there which is (dramatic pause because it’s just so ironic, the timing!) “5 reasons why I blog.” My response is here and I hereby tag all of you to take a shot at it!
OH, it is the HARDEST thing to explain. It’s even harder when you do and people seem so interested and excited and then you are excited for them…to the point that you help them get one set up…but then it’s just not “them” and then your upset that it wasn’t the same to them as it was to you…does that make sense?