I am reposting this from last year because I am once again comtemplating about sending one of these horrific letters. I am also lazy and incredibly busy…so what the hell.
originally posted on 11/29/05
Dear Family & Friends,
What an eventful year we have had here in the Flunderbuck household!
In February, Bob was promoted to a new position in the company, “Assistant to the Assistant General Manager”. We are so proud of him!
Robby is still in scouts and although he had to take some time off due to the burned cricket incident, he is once again back with his pack and tying knots with the best of them.
Suzie is still cheering away. Bob says she’ll be the cutest Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader that ever lived someday. Right now we’re just trying to get her potty-trained, but that’s another story. She’s placed in 3 pageants this year and as soon as she turns 4 she can shoot for the stars at the “Little Miss My Mom Dressed Me Like a 20 year old so she can fill some void in her life Pageant”. We could not be more proud of her!
I am keeping busy with the kids and my knitting. Bob says if I knit him 3 more sweaters, he’ll take me on a cruise! Luau Deck- Here I come!!
Seasons Greetings from our home to yours.
The Flunderbucks ~ 2005
Do you write an annual Christmas letter? Ack. I am debating on writing one for my family and my stomach is swirling just thinking about it. They always seem like brag letters to me, like somehow life has turned into a How Much Cool Shit Can You Do In 1 Year Contest.
“Wanna go skydiving?”
“Hell No”
“You could list it as one of the highlights in this year’s Christmas letter.”
“Oh, what the heck…”
Seriously, tell me you’ve read one of those syrupy-sweet-don’t-you-wanna-be-us letters. If not, I’ll send you a fat stack of them. I’ve actually created a scrapbook from the letters I’ve received over the years. The book is titled “Christmas Past” and I lay it out ever so gently on the good coffee table each & every holiday season for all to see and gag over. My Uncle and his wife continue to hold the title for the most bragging done in one letter. They sent out a hoo-boy-humdinger in 2000 that has yet to be beat but you never know, it could get bumped off this year. It’s doubtful but possible.
I was supposed to write my Christmas Letter today but I wrote this post instead. I’m just not up to it. I feel like I have a lot of cool things to fill my letter with but really- who the hell cares?
What’s your opinion on the whole shebang?
Do you write or loathe Christmas letters… or both?
Seriously?
People do this? I’ve never seen one of those letters before. God, how I am starting to love my family…
My guess? No body cares.
I wish I had time to send out a nice letter, but you know what… even if I did, I can’t remember what happened all year! :/
It never occured to me to write out one of these letters. It sounds so impersonal. Mine would be a more personal note.
I don’t write them. I can barely send out a card, much less a whole letter. I overheard one of the ladies in my office say that they’re going to write their letter this year from the perspective of the family dog. GAG.
I like reading them because they are usually funny without meaning to be funny.
I love getting those letters! Only because they are so fun to mock.
I can’t believe a few people here have never heard of the letters? Lucky them. I actually like getting them. I love that you have a book of them. I am going to do that but I just threw the humdinger of all letters away. It was the biggest bragging letter ever. They kept talking about how smart their three year old was and actually listed off everything she knew (Susie knows her ABC’s and quantum physics). They also bragged about their new home. I am a frickin Realtor, don’t tell me about the new home you bought without calling me. Thought you were a friend of my husbands for 10 years now. Guess not. We do get one letter every year that is actually funny. It is a list of “things we learned this year…” they talk about funny things like “Don’t go to Disneyland with a two year old” etc. It is cute.
Oh I do one every year and it’s a “darned if you do and darned if you don’t” situation. The only stuff that’s interesting sounds either a) conceited or b) depressing. You either get a letter where it’s “Johnny did this and Johnny did that” or “Rufus lost his job, we still can’t get pregnant, and the house burned down.”
But I write them anyway and try the “self-deprecating humor” attack. But that’s what got me started in blogging. I would get calls from people saying how they liked the Christmas letters and that they wished I’d write more. But I still worry about how they come off, every year. Finished ours up today in fact.
hehe…I’ve never gotten one of these letters, much less written one! I’m not much of a letter writer, I dont have the patience…
If I DID write one, it would probably go something like this:
Dear Family,
Nothing interesting happened in our neck of the woods this year. Well, nothing unless you consider it interesting that now our girls wipe their own butts and they go to school 5 days a week.
We really love it that you expect this letter from us, yet you dont pick up the telephone to call and say hi. By the way, here are some pictures of the girls that you havent seen since, uh, birth…
Blah, blah, blah…
Sincerely Yours,
The Family You Forgot!
LOL! All the family that we really care about lives close to us, or we talk to them regularly. The rest of them are far away and probably dont know MY name, let alone my kids’ names!!
I was with my mom this week when she ran into an old friend from school. After some chitchat my mom asked her what she had been up to.She went on about going to Italy and France and that she sold her house in California and is now living back in BC. She went on to say that she is spending the winter in the Cayman Islands. OK. Fine. Youare really, really rich. What made me roll my eyes was when she comlplained how sore her knees got during the long flights and how she would just rather stay home. Yah, Whatever. Boo hoo, I am sure those 4 enormous dimaond rings make your wrists ache too. Ungrateful woman.
I love writing my holiday newsletter. And I actually just posted to my blog about how to do it. Someone in the comments section sent me over here.
Here’s my post, if you’re interested–
How to Brag, er, Write a Holiday Newsletter
I must admit that I write a ‘letter’… although, I don’t send it to everyone, only to the people that don’t read my blog. And this year, I wrote it as if it was the front page of a newspaper - 5 short little ‘articles’ about family that visited, a trip we took and the joy (stress?) of having a baby who crawls! and climbs stairs! I look at is as a ‘teaser’ to encourage old friends and not-often-heard-from family to keep in touch… here are a few of the things we did this year - want to know more?! CALL US!
Nope, no form letter. An aquaintence of ours did one once and his wife had some injury and health problems and he wrote:
“Jane has been doing real well except that she still has the pain in the neck.”
I laughed all the way through December and part of January on that one!
We usually put on Santa hats and take a picture sitting on the motorcycle, so I’m sure my relatives use their imaginations to make up a story to go with it while they’re rolling their eyes and praying to St. Christopher for our safety.
A few years ago, pre-kids, we had one about how my husband had realized his dream and was touring w/ Bruce Springsteen, I was becoming a lingerie model, the usual. It was online-only so no family saw it but I think something funny, self-effacing, etc. would be fun.
No one wants to get a brag list but a “catching up” on what’s going on is nice to read.
In a year when every life changing event possible happened- death, job change, retirement, moving, home remodeling, kid on tour, kid under the sea- NO. I’m just not doing it. You just got my whole Christmas letter. Merry Christmas to you and yours. :-)
We blog. We don’t need these letters as an outlet anymore.
Poor suppressed Flunderbucks of the world. I say, let’s get em all blogs for Christmas.
I have written several, but I try to keep them funny and humble. I figure that everyone who needs to know already knows about the Pulitzer Prize and my appearance in the “Hot Office Workers over 40″ edition of Playboy.
I worked at a copy center in my younger days and used to save the really terrible ones. SO many were filled with pages of misery and illness.
Here are two classic examples:
“Dear Friends, Mother is still with us, though very frail.” (Is that a way to begin a letter??)
Or: “We are doing well, but our poor Deb will never be the same. In February, she suffered a terrible accident when she was walking between cars in a parking lot and one rolled forward, smashing both her legs…” (Oh people. If your friends don’t know about poor Deb after 10 months, maybe a Christmas letter is NOT the place to tell them!)
I like to get them and read between the lines.. I also stopped sending them and started the blog… Thought it might be easier for people to read what life is really like as it happens…
xo
LBC
I love your blog and that post is perfect.
Thanks for getting it all in proportion.
And if you ever publish that book I’d like to know about it.
Angela
Here would be my letter (if I were to write one)
Merry Christmas! hope you had a great year!
See what we’ve been up to at my blog!
http://his.guppystorm.com
That should take care of it….